stephen fry by making history

Author:making history
Language: eng
Format: epub

Unknown

202

‘Funnily enough,’ I said. ‘There is something that I want. There’s a kind of hole in the middle of me. I thought perhaps it was to do with my … you know, not being able to remember anything … maybe, what the hell … I’ll try one.’ I took a cigarette. Steve lit it for me with a brass Zippo, steadying my hand as he lit the end. ‘Yoh,’ I said, inhaling. ‘Oh yes. This is definitely what I wanted. God that’s good! Why did I never know? Well, obviously I did …’ I looked around me, suddenly more cheerful and noticed that a lot of people were smoking. ‘Amazing,’ I said, ‘I thought smokers were virtually extinct in America.’ Steve laughed and was about to reply when– ‘Hiya Mikey, hiya Steve,’ a waitress appeared with two menus and two glasses of iced water. ‘Hello … Jo-Beth,’ I said, reading the badge on her apron. ‘What can I get you two this morning?’ she asked, giving us each a menu and plucking two napkins from the chromium holder. She had put the napkins on the table as coasters, placed a glass of water on each and whipped out her notepad before I had had a chance to look at the first item on what appeared to be an improbably huge and complex menu. ‘Er …” I said, nervously watching her pen hover over the pad. ‘Steve, you first.’ ‘I guess I’ll have my usual, Jo-B, and Mikey here will have the same.’ ‘Oh, you guys are 50 unadventurous …’ she sighed with amused scorn as she plucked back the menus, squiggled on her pad and whisked herself off. ‘One day we’ll surprise you,’ Steve called after her. ‘Urn, obvious question, I know,’ I whispered, leaning forward, ‘but what is my usual?’ Steve twinkled. ‘You’ll just have to wait and see ‘You know,’ I said, looking at the burning tip of my cigarette with affection. ‘Part of me is beginning to enjoy this. It’s so mad, it’s 50 confusing.’

203

‘Sure,’ said Steve, ‘that’s just the way to look at it.’ ‘It’s like a scene from that movie Total Recall’ ‘Total Recall? I never caught that one.’ ‘No? Arnie, Sharon Stone … from the Philip K Dick novel?’ He shook his head. ‘Passed me by. So, this place familiar? Anything coming back? The smell of the pancakes, the steamy windows, the color of the walls?’ I shook my head, but smilingly. ‘No-o-o. That is, not exactly. But this dinery sort of atmosphere, I’ve seen it in a thousand movies.’ ‘Now that’s one thing that’s weird, Mike. This English accent of yours. It’s nearly perfect, you know? But you say things like “movies” and “cute” that limeys never say. English people say “films” and “nice” and “oh, I say” and stuff like that.’ ‘I always say “movies”. A lot of English people do. And “cute” as well. After all, it’s not as if we don’t get exposed to American culture all the time, is it? In fact Jane says that I talk like …’I broke off, frowning.

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